JR: “Welcome to WrestleMania, night one!”
King: “WWE Champion Trish Stratus will go one-on-one with Royal Rumble, and Elimination Chamber winner, the undefeated, Torrie Wilson!”
JR: “The long-awaited return of, in my opinion the best, former WWE Champion, Paige goes extreme with the monster truck, Ashley Graham in a No DQ Match! That will surely be a battle! Also, either the upstart, Brandi Rhodes or vampire, Ariel will be buried alive tonight!”
King: “Ariel’s all mind games. Brandi needs to keep up that strong determination she’s had since her battle with The Beautiful People to get over Ariel. As we’ve seen before, Ariel is absolutely unforgiving!
JR: “Lets not forget, Lana will duke it out with a member of the Beautiful People tonight. Alexa, will be by her side to cheer her on! Tonight we’ll see how far her training with Alexa has come.”
King: “But tonight, boy, Oh boy! Kelly and the Bellas settle the score! Kelly’s had goals she’s been wanting to accomplish but time and time again the Bellas have stunted her growth.
JR: “The Bellas feel the same way King! The Bellas feel like Kelly has constantly been in their way. Nikki Bella was tossed off the Hell in A Cell a few months back! Kelly spit in Nikki’s face!”
King: “We’re going to get a stinkface tonight JR but maybe there’s…
Carrie Underwood is in the ring, “It’s time for me to sing the National Anthem! Since I don’t have a match tonight, I’m doing the National Anthem!… I’ve been a featured performer on so many pay-per-views and on the biggest show of shows I don’t have a match. Since no one wanted to fight me I’m taking it upon myself to start this show off with a bang! I’m going to have my WrestleMania moment on my own tonight. Hit the lights!”
Security begins walking down the ramp.
Carrie doesn’t notice them. She begins preparing her vocals for a performance.
The crowd boos heavily. The crowd is annoyed by Carrie’s behavior.
Carrie has a bottle of water and rinses her mouth. She spits it into the crowd.
Carrie jokingly replies to the people she spit on, “Don’t worry you’re just small casualties for the greater good! You’re getting the benefit of my performance… “
Carrie’s arm is grabbed by the security team. The audience cheers loudly.
“… What the hell are you doing?! LET GO OF ME!” Carrie is alarmed.
One of the security guards grabs the mic out of the singer’s hand. The crowd begins singing, “Na-Na-Na-NA- Goodbye!”
“Someone get these people off of me! I was going to sing!”
Security forcefully escorts her out.
“This is my moment! Let me have my Mania moment! This was my time!”
JR: “Boy am I glad that’s over. That might very well be the most brutal thing we see tonight!”
King: “Doubt it.”